Pokémon Presents – A Bunch of Things That No One Asked For

Listen, I want to start this off by saying the following: I am truly a fan of Pokemon. I
remember asking my parent to buy me overpriced cards on Ebay. My first Pokemon cards were a
random base set pack that someone took the rare out of and put on Ebay. I was a sucker from
the start. I remember my parents going on an anniversary getaway, and me staying at my Uncle
Jim’s house. I accidentally let his cat out, and was very sad. But, when my parents came back,
they had bought me a Game Boy, and Pokemon Blue. What cat? Disaster averted.
I watched all of the cartoons. I played the TCG. I was even a certified “Professor” for the
TCG, and went to Nationals in 2002. Not even as a player, or Professor. Just to spectate!
Nothing could have prepared me for this moment.
Ladies and gentlemen: Start your….Pokemon? What in the YuGiOh GX did I just watch?

Credit: Nintendo

So, the two legendary Pokemon, Koraidon and Miraidon, are machines and can transform into
bikes, boats, and planes? They are also legendary, but there were a group of 4 people riding
them? Doesn’t seem very legendary to me.
Like, let’s have a legendary Pokémon that everyone is going to have, but I probably won’t even
be able to get my Hitmonlee, because apparently that potato-looking kicking machine is not a
fan favorite. Yea, he’s a Pokémon, but no one in this region even owns one, but we can all have
this mythical scooter. Have you seen the gas prices?
I will not dig much deeper into that because it hurts me, and we have so many more things to
tackle.
Super gem forms? No thank you. Pretty cool looking, but a little much, and this is how we know
we are out of ideas.
A scavenger hunt? I just spent 140+ hours looking for 107 wisps! My scavenger hunting days
are over. I feel like they are trying to add a bunch of things to the game, but none of these things
are what I am looking for. So, what am I looking for you ask? Oh boy, I will tell you. Thanks for
asking!
All I want is a game that takes the gameplay of Legends Arceus, and adds a traditional
Pokemon story. Give me a lead character, 8 gyms, two squabbling bad guy teams, and an Elite.

Consider this: You do not experience multiplayer until the end of the game. You pick the
faction that you want to join, and then you go on multiplayer missions with your clan. You battle
members of the other clans, and friendly battle with your friends to level up. There is a
leaderboard, and you accumulate points. Once you get so many points, you can open your own
gym! Design your own badge that people can win! Get your friends to come to your gym, and
they can be the opponents that the trainer must face in order to get to you. You can design your
own gym puzzles. You can be the end game content!

Credit: Nintendo

Add mini-games that you can play with your friends! Actually put Pokemon Café in the game
so you can run your own shop for extra monies, and a different experience! Imagine crafting
your own costumes, with your own logos. Add a camera mode, which can lead to an online
gallery where people can vote for their favorite moments, add captions, and have unique frames
as rewards. Link it with a brand like Shutterfly, and you can have the pictures you take in the
game sent to you and create your own real life albums. 8 x 10 of a Kangaskhan staring into the
sunset? Just kidding, Kangaskhan probably will not be in this game, either.
It might sound like I am asking for a lot, but these are things that have already been done. Heck,
at this point, bring back Pokemon Puzzle League as a game mode in this game! I just want it all.
Is that too much to ask?
Also, Pokemon Unite is bringing a Pika Party? So, I will be a Pikachu, playing with a team of
Pikachu, taking on a team of Pikachu, and jungling to defeat Pikachu, to be the strongest
Pikachu, and defeat the other Pikachu? OH, you can bet I am going to try it. Once.
Ok, I seem to have calmed down a bit. Going to go redownload Pokemon Masters EX, at least
until I remember why I stopped playing it the first time. Later!

Joe Cross

About The Author

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